Category: Parenting
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Sheep, Hoarders, and Helicopters: The Piñata Test
You can learn all you need to know about humans when you attend a child’s party featuring a piñata. The good news is that we can stop funding sociological and anthropological research and just start sending scientists to children’s birthday parties, which are known to be–wait, those are as expensive as a university grant. Possibly more expensive. Never…
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The Shut-Up Places
My kids and Leon and I are like a traveling road show. We spent the long weekend traveling down to the Monterey area to see our parents. Noah was in great form all weekend, if by “great” you mean “really whiny, oddly hungry, and also full of hilarious one-liners.” In other words, he’s four and…
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Little Wandering Daughter
As I drove out tonight, I looked up and saw the full moon in the sky. I took a moment to acknowledge my place underneath it. As I started driving again, I drove down the street past other cars, and we were like ants scurrying along on our busy way, oblivious beneath the moon. And…
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Like Putty in My…Hair
I drifted awake this morning, trying to decide if I should get up and hustle us to church or not. One of my kids loves going to church and asks if we can go more often whenever we’ve skipped. Another of my kids hates church, and I have to overcome a lot of unhappiness to…
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I Don’t Wanna Come Up with a Creative Title
I just keep starting to cry today. I’m not depressed. I don’t have PMS. I’m tired. I do feel a little beaten down. I have a child with challenges. School can be terrible sometimes. I yelled at someone in an IEP meeting, and I don’t approve of yelling at people you are trying to work with.…
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So, You Would Like to Have a Roomba…
I have a new Roomba. I thought I wanted one more than just about anything. And then I got one. And I was RIGHT! This thing has changed my life. My floors look amazing, even with three kids, one golden retriever, two cats, and a giant rabbit in the house. And I swear that has…
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Picture Day!
Recently, a small flyer came home in my child’s folder. It said, “Picture day is coming.” I remarked to Leon, “I’ll bet most parents don’t read that as a warning.” But honestly, I know enough of you do. I vaguely remember picture day. They’d line us up, give us a small black comb. (Where…
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“Me Time”
People are always saying how important it is to take time for yourself. “Me time.” You read this in magazines, and people announce that you need this when you look frazzled. It’s not just something that would be nice, but it’s something that’s necessary for health. Just Google it and you’ll find at least half…
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What Love Looks Like: A Comic
For more comic silliness, see First Day of School. For more on love amid the chaos, see It’s Complicated.
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Unsolved Mysteries
My house would be a great setting for a mystery show or book. It’s full of problems, crime scenes, suspects, and evidence. What we seem to be lacking is the Encylopedia Brown, DCS Foyle, or Jessica Fletcher. Here’s a list of heretofore unsolved mysteries: 1) Why the refrigerator smells. 2) Where all the shoes have gone. ALL the…