lies Archive
Nobody Has It All
I hear a lot about these alleged “mommy wars” in the media. Working mothers and stay-at-home mothers* are pitted against one another, and are made to seem like enemies decrying one another’s life choices.** We all know this is crap, right? I mean, sure, we all encounter individual people full of opinions about what we
Category: Life
I’m Not Cut Out for This
I’m not cut out for this. I turn around in my seat, having just finished hollering something ineffective and useless like, “I mean it!” And the children don’t care, and they aren’t listening, and I am filled with rage. I’m not cut out for this parenting thing. We are on our way back from Lake
Category: Life
Signs of Subpar Parenting
I’m not saying that all this stuff happened. This is just a random list of red flags, I swear, just signs that would indicate subpar parenting. Telling his father that we should have named Asher Ashhole instead Going to Mother’s Day tea and hearing the sentence “My Mommy spends all her time______” finished with the word
Category: Funnies
Sacrificing Mom for the Dog
IMPORTANT UPDATE: My dad, in response to this blog post, just sent me photographic evidence: Only it’s clearly a Photoshop job or something. If you are confused, it’s because you haven’t read the whole sordid story yet. *** So it’s time to set the story straight. My dad constantly tells a version of this story
Category: Funnies
Photojournalism at Its Finest
My friend Joe feels this blog should contain something other than posts about my children. Needless to say, I have TONS of other stuff going on. So, Joe, this is what I’ve been up to: I won a Nobel Peace Prize. This is me parking in my “special spot.” I ate some jelly
Category: Funnies